Monday, September 27, 2010

To My Unborn Children, You Are In A Better Place Than I

For those that didn't know Lauren and I were pregnant. Unfortunately it was a tubal pregnancy, to which Lauren had to have surgery to remove the pregnancy. After the surgery we discovered that there might have been two babies, both in the same tube. We had talked that if we had a boy and girl twin that we should name them Xion & Cileste (Variations of Zion and Celeste). We have decided to name the two that, and we find it fitting, since both are in Heaven, and Xion means Heaven and Cileste means Heavenly. I write this entry (crying as I do this) to my two children whom I will get to meet someday in Heaven, two individuals that make me look forward to that day even more.

Dear Cileste and Xion,

At only 3 1/2 weeks inside your mother you had already made me a very happy man. A father is something that I have wanted to be for a long time, and you blessed me with your lives. Even though I did not have a chance to get to know you, I know that I love you both.
Selfishly I would want you to be here with me, it hurts thinking about not being able to watch you two grow up. But you are the lucky ones, the ones who get to see Our Father in Heaven. You will fortunately not have to deal with worldly problems, something that every father would love to be able to do for there children, but cannot succeed at. While you're up there, get to know your family. There are some really good people up there with you, and they have some stories to tell about your mother and I.
The two of you make me want to be a better man, and when you eventually have a little brother or sister, to be a good father for them. I will never forget the two of you, and I will always think about you. Even in the short time you were here, you meant everything to me.
There is so much I want to say, but I can't seem to figure out how to say it. I know you are happy and at peace, and you will be missed.

Your loving father,

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Summer 2010

It has been an enjoyable summer this year.

We have worked on our garden, both harvesting the spring/summer crop and planted the fall/winter crop. It has been both enjoyable and hot.

I went to LTC camp for the 2nd year, in preparation for backpacking in New Mexico next year. Irony though was that I twisted my ankle on the third day... remember preparing for backpacking? So we strapped some gear to my crutches and I hiked with crutches ;-p .

We got a new truck and traded in the cavalier, which I am LOVING.

We went to the ER with stomach flu, boy was that fun.

We went on vacation this past summer with my mom, step-dad, sister, brother-in-law, nephew, and brother to Crystal Beach. It was an enjoyable weekend, minus the mosquitoes and the a/c not working for the majority of the weekend. Lauren and I got to see the sun set from the ocean, which was beautiful.

This week we went and bought some clothes for the new school year, both professional and fitting of our personalities.

With just 6 days until we go back for training, we are going to enjoy the rest of it as much as possible.

Síochána a bheith agat le,
Tillotson Clan

Friday, May 21, 2010

4 Years of Happiness

Today Lauren and I celebrate 4 years of happiness together. It has been a year of ups with a lot of downs, but God has blessed us both so very much, and with his strength and love in our our lives we will have many more happy years together. God has blessed me so much with my amazing wife that I'm posting Proverbs 31:10-31 (The Message version) know as Hymn of the Wife.

A good woman is hard to find,
and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve,
and never has reason to regret it. Never spiteful, she treats him generously
all her life long. She shops around for the best yarns and cottons,
and enjoys knitting and sewing. She's like a trading ship that sails to faraway places
and brings back exotic surprises. She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast
for her family and organizing her day. She looks over a field and buys it,
then, with money she's put aside, plants a garden. First thing in the morning, she dresses for work,
rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work,
is in no hurry to call it quits for the day. She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth,
diligent in homemaking. She's quick to assist anyone in need,
reaches out to help the poor. She doesn't worry about her family when it snows;
their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing,
and dresses in colorful linens and silks. Her husband is greatly respected
when he deliberates with the city fathers. She designs gowns and sells them,
brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops. Her clothes are well-made and elegant,
and she always faces tomorrow with a smile. When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say,
and she always says it kindly. She keeps an eye on everyone in her household,
and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her;
her husband joins in with words of praise: "Many women have done wonderful things,
but you've outclassed them all!" Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades.
The woman to be admired and praised
is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. Give her everything she deserves!
Festoon her life with praises!

Síochána a bheith agat le,
Tillotson Clan

Monday, April 26, 2010


Why does it seem like things just aren't made to work out. It is not all the time, but when it happens, it is not just one thing, it is EVERYTHING. We get our hopes up and then they come crashing down. Sometimes I would love to let things coast by, but doing so goes against who I am (I know some of you might find that hard to believe.)

It is that time of year again, where all teachers in the state of Texas are just tired. TAKS season. I'm not bashing the TAKS, I agree with an accountability system, but it is just a stressful time of the year. There are some other issues that I'm not going to go into at this time as well. But last night, to top it all off, Tomar our Min-Pin mix got out.
1. I worked way to hard replacing my fence last summer for this to happen.
2. This weekend, I thought i blocked off his exits. (he started climbing the fence that separated the garden from the rest of the yard, and then on that side, we found a HUGE hole under the fence)
3. Due to not knowing when he got out yesterday, plus we got home after 9:30 and he is a black dog, makes it hard to find him.
4. But what bothers me the most I think in all of this, is that if we don't get him back, that would be 3 dogs that we have lost in 1 1/2 years.
-Darrel died 12/08
-We had to put Iris down 11/09
-and now Tomar is gone

I hope and pray that someone has found him and will call the vet today (number on his rabies tag) and we will get him back.

Síochána a bheith agat le,
Tillitson Clan

P.S.: And for those who might be thinking Lauren and I are having marital problems due to the things I will not talk about at this time, do not worry, that is not an issue.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

In Honor of Easter

Yesterday I found a piece of paper under my windshield at Sam's that had the title "My Testimony" and in honor of the anniversary of the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, I thought that I would post it.

"My Testimony"
Twenty-nine years ago the Lord saved me at a motel in Las Vegas, Nevada. It was about 8:00 in the morning. I was about to drink some wine and work some.
I was not happy that morning and very despondent. I know now that God worked it out that way.
I was sitting at a table in the motel room about to go to work. I turned on the radio looking for some music, but I found someone talking about God. He said, If you will ask the Lord to please forgive your sins, He will save you and give you a new life, and then thank Him.
Well, I thought about it just about a minute. I did not trust, but I went to the bed and knelt down, and said, Lord, if you are real like this man said, please forgive my sins and save me and give me a new life. Then I thanked him.
I didn't know what being saved was, but I immediately lost my despondency and I felt peaceful and full of joy. I asked the Lord, If I'm really saved, help me to not sin.
So friend, if you feel the Lord speaking to you and you would like to be saved and have a new life, get off by yourself and pray. Ask the Lord to forgive your sins and save you. If you mean business with God, He will save you.
-Inspired by God

I read this and began thinking of when I was truly saved. I was great at being a two-face. When around people I could appear as this perfect innocent person, but on my own I did A LOT that I'm not proud of. This can be a stressful way to live, because it requires a great deal of lies to keep the two separate. But, no one can keep that up for ever and the two sides eventually met. It caused someone to get hurt, and at that moment I heard God say "Shaun, stop being dumb! This is not the plan that I have for you, you will change" and at that moment I felt different, a release from the "two-face" life. I now have a relationship with my savior, and God has showed me how to use that time of my life as a way to help share Him with others.

By reading this first I have a question, Do you have that relationship with Him, that He desires? And second if so, take this time to reflect on your testimony, and the blessings that God has given you.

Síochána a bheith agat le,
Tillitson Clan